Closure

God, it's been two weeks since my CPE program, and the last time I blogged.  Most of the 7 day drive back home either had no internet, or I was too tired to make full sentences.  I plan to blog about that when I have more time, but let me just say it was awesome to see the youth mission team in Alabama and Rachael in Vegas, and a big THANK YOU to Chad for helping me drive back home to Los Angeles.

But when I got back home, I didn't feel like I was home.  I hugged part of my house when I got back, but then opened the door to find that my roommate was already in the process of moving.  I'm not irritated about him already packing, but when I saw all the boxes stacked in the house, my home didn't feel like home anymore.

I got to hang out with Mika and her mom and sister, and it was really nice to see my girlfriend and her family.  Mari (Mika's sis) was moving into the dorms that weekend, and so I got to spend time with Mika as much as I could.  I drove up to Fresno to see family and my nephew got bigger! he now mumbles, and my sis (Chari) wants me to play with him more so he can start calling me "uncle".  After spending two days with Mika and her family, then spending two days with my own family, I came back to my own house, realizing that between the boxes and my junk, I felt more comfortable being in my office.

It gave me reason to work on my sermon that I gave today, and I worked in my office, and then stayed overnight for two nights because of the amount of driving as well as the meetings I needed to be at church and that the water heater went out at my house.

So, as I wrote about my summer and how it felt being a chaplain, the meetings were great reunions.  It's amazing to just spend time with friends because that seemed to be a constant factor for my disconnect from being back home.  I had dinner with my roommate, which was really fun because we caught up on everything. 

So today, I gave my message.  I told many stories about what I did this past summer, what I saw, what I heard, and how God was working through it all.  My buddy Chad is trying to put it online so if he gets the sermon on the internet i'll pass it out to everyone because I was really proud of what I said.  I was really proud of what I did.  People tell me that I have a level of confidence that I never had before.  And some congregation members began telling me their valleys and "chaplain Jon" immediately kicked in. 

As I pack and get ready to move to my new place, I recognize that today was good closure to what is about to come soon.  I was afraid that my new identity would be lost, but it seems to be "merged" with who I was.  I am finally coming to the understanding that I did change, and am beginning to feel comfortable being in my own skin.  And I was welcomed with open arms by everyone: my girlfriend, family, roommate, friends, and  church members.

Thank you.